thethemeis: Lifetime Achievement
theauthoris: Deadbeat
As Kane watched the counter spin away he began to consider just how blessed he was. It's not uncommon to enter into a religion and allow it's laws and customs to dictate the way you run your life. It's fairly normal to learn a set of beliefs and be entirely convinced by them. But it's incredibly fortunate to reach the afterlife and discover that the majority of your beliefs are true, especially when you've invested so much in them. Kane thought to himself, "A lot of people are gonna be pissed."
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It was almost 15 years prior to Kane's death that he was first approached to begin 're-education'. He'd been working at the London office for a few months and had just started to make a name for himself as an up-and-coming name in the financial sector. Of course, he didn't believe any of it at first. Nobody did. But when a senior director of one of the countries biggest banks invites you to a incredibly private function with other high powered members of society, you claim to believe anything he tells you to.
"Now don't ask too many questions, just remain polite and assertive. These first few meetings are designed to test the character of the new intake pool. I'm sure you don't quite believe all of this yet, but thats ok, I didn't either. You seem like a very promising individual and fit the mould perfectly for a follower of the Church of Vita Reliquum. Trust me, this is something you'll want to be part of."
Kane believed that instantly. He had been a member of enough societies, distinguished clubs and university sports teams to know that networking was essential to success. They all had their own strange customs and practises, but the contacts you made in these places far outweighed the indignity of reciting the occasional absurd oath or donning the riduculous neccessary clothing.
The first few meetings contained very little information much as Kane had been told. There was talk of some of the values held within the church and a very vague history of the religion way back to the earliest civilisations. But eventually after the 4th weekly meeting of the ever decreasing 'intake pool', Kane was pulled aside by the Dux Ducis and told to attend the church the next night to 'ascend into true wisdom'.
He went back as asked, now admittedly slightly curious as to what secrets this church truly had. There were two other guys from the intake pool there. He learnt their names, but neither seemed particularly important so he wasted little time on them. There were also what he assumed to be several higher ranking members of the church there too, in ceremonial gowns. Two hours were spent explaining just how secretive this church was and how private it was determined to remain. There were stories told of members who had exposed the secrets held with the society and the grim fates that awaited them. No knowledge of your involvement with the Church of Vita Reliquum was to be told to friends, family or ever spouses. An opportunity was given to leave the church at one point and exclude yourself from it's teachings. One of the men from the intake pool nervously got up and left, Kane had already forgotten his name.
The Dux Ducis pulled out a highly decorated scroll and began his speech. "For thousands of years our church has know the truth behind the mystery of the afterlife and with it we have an insight into the true meaning of this life. Despite our great history, we aim to practise as a relatively modern church and pride ourselves on teaching only what we know for sure to be true. Whilst there are many great men who have dedicated their lives to proposing theories for the gaps in our knowledge of the world and it's creation, we feel no shame in being unable to answer many of the great questions that other religions childishly guess at."
"For centuries we have obtained and catalogued anecdotal evidence of the first moments of the afterlife as experienced by those who have come close enough to death to witness them and return to us. You will both be familiar with the bright light and tunnel visions that are so often associated with near death experiences, but those are merely the first moments of the afterlife. We have repeatedly heard of people who have soared through a tunnel to a great, light-filled plane where they possess no physical presence, but feel a great control over their barren surroundings. Here they are greeted by a giant entity which calculates and tallies the accomplishments of their life. We refer to these achievements as factum and the value of these factum is measured in venerate. The anecdotal evidence differs greatly over what form the entity takes, it appears to assume a form which feels most natural for the individual viewing it. Much of the recent accounts have likened it to a ticking, numerical display very similar to a computer screen. Some of our followers refer to it as the 'Great Scoreboard in the Sky'."
"By collecting what information we could on the various factum that people were rewarded for and where possible, the value of the venerate they received, we were able to make a list. For many years this was a very short list with many contradicting factum, but with the advancement of modern medicine, as well as the disciplined development of our own methods of gaining information, we have been able to create a far larger and more detailed catalogue of factum. We call this the 'Universal Marking Scheme', or UMS for short. The UMS is the churches most valuable asset and one which as you now know, we a re prepared to keep secret at any cost. With the UMS you are given a comprehensive yet incredibly open guide by which you can live your life. A life which will give you the best possible chance of progressing to whatever lies beyond this world."
The Dux Ducis went on to explain various set life-paths that would lead to success in accordance to the UMS and all the existing and emerging theories into what attaining various ratings on your own 'Great Scoreboard' would mean. It was a lot to take in and Kane was still sceptical of religion, but over the coming weeks and months he would read more and more on the topic. He made an effort to talk to various devout followers and even some of the highly revered indium ereptorum (individuals that had witnessed the 'Great Scoreboard' first hand). He began to find the evidence of the Church of Vita Reliquum's beliefs harder to dispute and though there were corruptive and power abusing forces at work within the religion, as there were with any powerful organisation, it's overall message seemed innocent and truthful. So Kane dedicated the next 14 and a half years of his life to following the UMS in hope of being truly successful in life and progressing to whatever came next.
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As Kane watched the counter slowly rising, condensing his life's achievements into numerical values and tallying them together, he rejoiced in accuracy with which the Church of Vita Reliquum had foretold events so far. He had no physical form, but felt and thought exactly as he had when he was alive, if not more powerfully. He was able to comprehend and control he environment totally. He had access to all his memories at once, even those long forgotten and erased by alcohol and other narcotics. Whilst the counter ticked away he could see all of the factum that he was receiving and the value attached to each one. But he could also see the factum he had failed to achiever, the various paths he could have taken and ways in which he could have maximised what the venerate he received. It was an amazing and spiritual experience like no other he had encountered, but his mind was focused entirely on the rate at which his score increased.
All of his professional accomplishments had already been taken into account and Kane was more or less on track. He hadn't done badly in that department, whilst he was alive he was considered one of the most successful businessmen in his field expertise. Moderately rich from years of working towards a highly distinguished position and widely envied and loathed by those that knew him and those that didn't alike. But here he was up against everyone that had existed throughout history. The UMS didn't mark professional success by financial gain so much (though there were points for that). It focused more excelling within any given field.
The majority of the ways venerate were distributed suggested that the highest rewards were for whoever made the biggest impact on the world, in whatever shape or form. There were no ethical or moral boundaries to overcome. There was as much opportunity to succeed by being an incredibly compassionate individual who had saved and natured a great deal of live as there was a psychopath who had ruined and ended many. Doctors and warmongers both ranked equal, as did architects and terrorists, liberators and dictators, teachers and serial child abusers. It all boiled down to the impact you had and the way in which your legacy and actions would be viewed by others. This wasn't a fact that the church liked the emphasise, but it was all there on the list for all to see.
This in itself created a problem for Kane. He had mapped and calculated his own score for years, tallying his factum and their venerate carefully to ensure that he would obtained what was widely believed to be a score capable of allowing passage to whatever came next. But he could only guess at he would be perceived by others. He had been sensible when projecting data for it. He gave modest estimates to ensure that there would be room for error, but even still...
Kane's interpersonal relationships were next to be calculated. First up, marital status. Kane had always cared deeply for his wife, they had met at a young age and married soon after. He knew as soon as he met her that he would be lucky to have her and once the ring was on her finger he would do all he could to ensure that he never let her go. He loved many things about his wife, but what he adored most about her was just how jealous nearly ever man who met her was of him. She was an aspiring model when they met (though he soon made her give that up), but even well into her thirties, she looked absolutely stunning. And she wasn't just beautiful, she was smart too, caring, great company and most of all, loyal. Even before he joined the church Kane knew she was a great catch, but once he began to fully understand the UMS, he realised just how good an asset she was.
The thing is, the UMS doesn't favour massively the idea of monogamy. There is a faithfulness factum based on relationship type and duration, but it is widely known in the church (though rarely spoken of) that the most efficient route to take is to have other sexual partners. It would be irresponsible to openly have multiple sexual partners, despite the teachings of the church you still have to fit you actions into a modern western world. Equally it would be pointless to have only a few sexual partners, as the venerate gained would fail to out way the amount lost of voiding the faithfulness factum.
So throughout his marriage Kane made a habit of having multiple discrete affairs with as man women as possible. He took as many business trips as he could and made the most of the time away. There was also an added incentive to try and impregnate as many women as possible as this carried with it added venerate. The amount was nowhere near the value you'd receive for a child you helped raise yourself and you wouldn't be entitled to any bonus venerate brought about by that child's future success, but it was still easy moneys for a few minutes work. Obviously this was not always possible to do without causing future problems, but when business trips took Kane away to another continent where he actions would never come back to haunt him he could sew his oats freely.
Another well known but rarely spoken of element of the UMS was that there was no distinction between consensual sex and forced intercourse. This made things a lot easier as often the prostitutes in these foreign countries had easy access to contraception. It was much easier for Kane to rent a car for the day and make his way to a small village before selecting an appropriate woman to potentially bare his child. He had no idea how many illegitimate children he had whilst alive, but here he could see the sheer number of them. The venerate they carried with them individually wasn't much, but when put together they outweighed the majority of his other achievements in life. They made his many hours of charity work look like a complete waste of time, even his educational accomplishments paled in comparison. He could have used all the time he spent working out fathering more illegitimate children, and even with the venerate he would have lost by being out of shape, he'd have enough extra to cover not nurturing the children he had with his wife. If Kane had any idea he was this fertile he would have changed his life-path a long time ago.
The counter kept on going but Kane knew by now that it was enough. He just hoped that the target so many in the church thought was enough to get you through to whatever was next was right. He watched it climb higher and higher. He saw the accomplishments of the children he had raised and the legacy he had on the financial world. It counted the smaller effects he had had on peoples lives, brief encounters and the unknown inspiration he had given people. Slowly the speed of the counter began to decrease as it reached its final resting place. The last number ticket over and everything went silent. Kane waited patiently to see what happened next.
He considered the many wild theories as to what form of reality would follow. Many believed that the world would start again in a much similar fashion but with fewer people. They claimed that this may have already happened before and people are just being whittled down to the best few. Others carried the idea that the absolute best scorers would live eternally in a heaven like existence, with the lowest scorers forced to spend eternity in hell. It had even been suggested that the lucky few qualify for an entirely new an unconceivable reality with new challenges to faces and a fully wiped memory. Kane had no idea what was coming, but he had spent the majority of his life ensuring that he would be able to participate in it.
Then the 'Great Scoreboard' disappeared and was replaced with a message.
Then everything went black.
The Dux Ducis went on to explain various set life-paths that would lead to success in accordance to the UMS and all the existing and emerging theories into what attaining various ratings on your own 'Great Scoreboard' would mean. It was a lot to take in and Kane was still sceptical of religion, but over the coming weeks and months he would read more and more on the topic. He made an effort to talk to various devout followers and even some of the highly revered indium ereptorum (individuals that had witnessed the 'Great Scoreboard' first hand). He began to find the evidence of the Church of Vita Reliquum's beliefs harder to dispute and though there were corruptive and power abusing forces at work within the religion, as there were with any powerful organisation, it's overall message seemed innocent and truthful. So Kane dedicated the next 14 and a half years of his life to following the UMS in hope of being truly successful in life and progressing to whatever came next.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
As Kane watched the counter slowly rising, condensing his life's achievements into numerical values and tallying them together, he rejoiced in accuracy with which the Church of Vita Reliquum had foretold events so far. He had no physical form, but felt and thought exactly as he had when he was alive, if not more powerfully. He was able to comprehend and control he environment totally. He had access to all his memories at once, even those long forgotten and erased by alcohol and other narcotics. Whilst the counter ticked away he could see all of the factum that he was receiving and the value attached to each one. But he could also see the factum he had failed to achiever, the various paths he could have taken and ways in which he could have maximised what the venerate he received. It was an amazing and spiritual experience like no other he had encountered, but his mind was focused entirely on the rate at which his score increased.
All of his professional accomplishments had already been taken into account and Kane was more or less on track. He hadn't done badly in that department, whilst he was alive he was considered one of the most successful businessmen in his field expertise. Moderately rich from years of working towards a highly distinguished position and widely envied and loathed by those that knew him and those that didn't alike. But here he was up against everyone that had existed throughout history. The UMS didn't mark professional success by financial gain so much (though there were points for that). It focused more excelling within any given field.
The majority of the ways venerate were distributed suggested that the highest rewards were for whoever made the biggest impact on the world, in whatever shape or form. There were no ethical or moral boundaries to overcome. There was as much opportunity to succeed by being an incredibly compassionate individual who had saved and natured a great deal of live as there was a psychopath who had ruined and ended many. Doctors and warmongers both ranked equal, as did architects and terrorists, liberators and dictators, teachers and serial child abusers. It all boiled down to the impact you had and the way in which your legacy and actions would be viewed by others. This wasn't a fact that the church liked the emphasise, but it was all there on the list for all to see.
This in itself created a problem for Kane. He had mapped and calculated his own score for years, tallying his factum and their venerate carefully to ensure that he would obtained what was widely believed to be a score capable of allowing passage to whatever came next. But he could only guess at he would be perceived by others. He had been sensible when projecting data for it. He gave modest estimates to ensure that there would be room for error, but even still...
Kane's interpersonal relationships were next to be calculated. First up, marital status. Kane had always cared deeply for his wife, they had met at a young age and married soon after. He knew as soon as he met her that he would be lucky to have her and once the ring was on her finger he would do all he could to ensure that he never let her go. He loved many things about his wife, but what he adored most about her was just how jealous nearly ever man who met her was of him. She was an aspiring model when they met (though he soon made her give that up), but even well into her thirties, she looked absolutely stunning. And she wasn't just beautiful, she was smart too, caring, great company and most of all, loyal. Even before he joined the church Kane knew she was a great catch, but once he began to fully understand the UMS, he realised just how good an asset she was.
The thing is, the UMS doesn't favour massively the idea of monogamy. There is a faithfulness factum based on relationship type and duration, but it is widely known in the church (though rarely spoken of) that the most efficient route to take is to have other sexual partners. It would be irresponsible to openly have multiple sexual partners, despite the teachings of the church you still have to fit you actions into a modern western world. Equally it would be pointless to have only a few sexual partners, as the venerate gained would fail to out way the amount lost of voiding the faithfulness factum.
So throughout his marriage Kane made a habit of having multiple discrete affairs with as man women as possible. He took as many business trips as he could and made the most of the time away. There was also an added incentive to try and impregnate as many women as possible as this carried with it added venerate. The amount was nowhere near the value you'd receive for a child you helped raise yourself and you wouldn't be entitled to any bonus venerate brought about by that child's future success, but it was still easy moneys for a few minutes work. Obviously this was not always possible to do without causing future problems, but when business trips took Kane away to another continent where he actions would never come back to haunt him he could sew his oats freely.
Another well known but rarely spoken of element of the UMS was that there was no distinction between consensual sex and forced intercourse. This made things a lot easier as often the prostitutes in these foreign countries had easy access to contraception. It was much easier for Kane to rent a car for the day and make his way to a small village before selecting an appropriate woman to potentially bare his child. He had no idea how many illegitimate children he had whilst alive, but here he could see the sheer number of them. The venerate they carried with them individually wasn't much, but when put together they outweighed the majority of his other achievements in life. They made his many hours of charity work look like a complete waste of time, even his educational accomplishments paled in comparison. He could have used all the time he spent working out fathering more illegitimate children, and even with the venerate he would have lost by being out of shape, he'd have enough extra to cover not nurturing the children he had with his wife. If Kane had any idea he was this fertile he would have changed his life-path a long time ago.
The counter kept on going but Kane knew by now that it was enough. He just hoped that the target so many in the church thought was enough to get you through to whatever was next was right. He watched it climb higher and higher. He saw the accomplishments of the children he had raised and the legacy he had on the financial world. It counted the smaller effects he had had on peoples lives, brief encounters and the unknown inspiration he had given people. Slowly the speed of the counter began to decrease as it reached its final resting place. The last number ticket over and everything went silent. Kane waited patiently to see what happened next.
He considered the many wild theories as to what form of reality would follow. Many believed that the world would start again in a much similar fashion but with fewer people. They claimed that this may have already happened before and people are just being whittled down to the best few. Others carried the idea that the absolute best scorers would live eternally in a heaven like existence, with the lowest scorers forced to spend eternity in hell. It had even been suggested that the lucky few qualify for an entirely new an unconceivable reality with new challenges to faces and a fully wiped memory. Kane had no idea what was coming, but he had spent the majority of his life ensuring that he would be able to participate in it.
Then the 'Great Scoreboard' disappeared and was replaced with a message.
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CONGRATULATIONS KANE JACKSON, YOU SCORED 1,356,534,765,037!
YOU FINISHED IN 7,635,027,836th PLACE!
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Then everything went black.
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